


Wishing you were real

by cuddlypillow



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Becoming Deviant, F/M, Falling In Love, Implied Sexual Content, Making Out, Oneshot, Pining, but might add a chapter, deviant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2020-07-09 13:47:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19888828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cuddlypillow/pseuds/cuddlypillow
Summary: "Elijah Kamski was living a lie. For many many years. A long time it hadn’t bothered him but the recent events had changed this. He secretly wished to flee from his lies.The lies he had created himself. For himself."





	Wishing you were real

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I begun this story a long time ago when I found this specific song from Matt Maeson - Tribulation (Stripped)  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fR0ZJsZQXjQ. I highly recommend you to listen to it :)  
> This is still unbetaed but I hope you enjoy this little story anyways.

Blonde… Blonde, silky hair was the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes. He blinked a few times and stretched his arms over the comforter to feel a bit more awake.  
Moving to lay on his side, he propped himself on his underarm, his other hand slit over the hourglass shaped figurine that laid next to him.

“Good morning, beautiful.” he hummed. She slowly rose and turned around to greet him with a perfect smile. “Good morning, Elijah. How did you sleep?”  
“Good, with you beside me.”  
“Should I prepare breakfast?” she asked.  
“Yes, please.”

Chloe stood up, the comforter slowly slipping from her perfect porcelain skin. She felt no shame when she opened the curtains a bit further, while being fully naked.  
Elijah watched her swaying hips as she went to the chair where she had draped her usual blue dress. Four moles, he counted on her back. Six more were scattered over her entire body. Elijah had placed everyone of them himself. Knew exactly where they were hidden.

“What do you wish to eat?” she asked after putting her underwear and dress on.  
“Surprise me, love.” he said. Chloe nodded and left the room.  
When she was gone, Elijah sunk back into his pillow, arms stretched to the sides, while growling unpleased.

Elijah Kamski was living a lie. For many many years. A long time it hadn’t bothered him but the recent events had changed this. He secretly wished to flee from his lies.  
The lies he had created himself. For himself.

A knock at the door woke him from his thoughts.  
Chloe came back. “I served your breakfast, Elijah.”  
She went into his massive boudoir and brought him a dark blue jeans and a white shirt. On top of the stack of clothes laid his glasses. She put everything on the bed and took her place next to the door, her arms crossed behind her back. She was a bit smaller than him and her blue eyes looked up, searched his own, when he stood right in front of her, now fully dressed.

Gently his hand caressed the side of her face and he bowed down to give her a small kiss on the lips. She reacted as always, closing her eyes, putting her own, much smaller hand above his and leaning into the kiss.  
Elijah remembered a time where he had felt butterflies in his belly when she did this. How alive and happy he had felt. Now it was a simple routine. Something he did because… Why did he even do it? Thinking about it, it was just another test for her.

He took a step back, taking his hand abruptly from her which made her stumble a bit.  
“Oh, I’m so-!” she wanted to apologize but he interrupted her. “Don’t!” he hissed.  
Her LED spun bright yellow before turning back to it’s usual blue state. She took a step to the side so he could pass the door into the living room.

Chloe had made him blueberry pancakes. He ate them unsatisfied while thumbing through the notifications on his phone. Nothing interesting.  
The usual news about the android revolution greeted him on every social media...  
When he heard the accustomed, small steps from bare feet behind him, he knew Chloe was done with cleaning the bedroom.  
“Did you like it?” she asked and reached for the empty plate to clean it.  
Elijah’s hand rushed forward and caught her hand before she could touch it.

Her already big eyes grew a bit wider in shock, her LED now yellow again. “Are you sure you want to clean this?” he asked her.  
“Yes. That’s my task, taking care of everything in this house and you, Elijah.” she answered as it was written in her programming.

She was the perfect android. The perfect wife he had designed her to be. The woman he had always wanted. The girl he fell in love with…  
But also the puppet he didn’t want anymore, because he had realized that he was living a lie.  
She didn’t love him. She couldn’t because everything she said and did were just zero’s and one’s he had coded and planted inside her artificial mind.  
She was one of manys he had created - now the only left.

Elijah didn’t care that she had a fake heart, a thirium pump. Or that she was made of different biocomponents he had invented years ago. He didn’t care, that her blood was blue and not red as his.

To say it the simplest way: Elijah Kamski was upset that Chloe wasn’t a deviant.  
Any simple android deviated these days. Even the advanced prototypes like Connor or Markus. But Chloe was stuck in her routine. After all those years when she was more or less trapped in his house, she had never doubted her existence.  
Of course Elijah knew, that it would only take the touch of another deviant to make her into one herself, but he wanted her to do achieve it herself. To overcome her program without a little virus or whatever. So that she would find her own secret exit in her zen garden.  
He was so sure she could do it. She was the first android to pass the Turing test, she was strong. Is this my fault? he thought. Do I keep her from becoming herself? Becoming human?

Elijah let go of her hand and she slowly retracted it.  
“You don’t want me clean it?”  
“No.” he said and proceeded to clean it himself in the sink. She looked misplaced.  
“What would you like to do? Something I didn’t told you to do?” he asked.  
“Uhm- I don’t know…” she seemed to think. “Maybe swim a bit?”  
“Sure, then do that.”  
She went to change into a bikini and crossed the living room a moment later. Elijah could hear the splash of water and followed; watched her diving head first into the clear water. Her body hit the top of the water in the ideal angle to create as less splatter as possible.  
When she came back to the surface she turned around and smiled at him.  
“Join me?”

He was too lazy to go back and get swim shorts, it was his own house anyways, so he simply took off his clothes and slowly stepped into the pleasantly temperated water.  
Together they took a few leaps in the water until he took a break, leaning on the rim towards the window, taking in the scene outside.  
He winced when two warm hands found his shoulders and started to massage them. Chloe had sneaked up behind him. Slowly she worked on his tensed muscles.  
“Is something bothering you, Elijah?”

“Yes.”  
Quickly he turned around, took her by her shoulder and pressed her back against the rim of the pool. Water splashed everywhere. A surprised, small cry left her lips and her LED turned red. It was bearly for a second but Elijah had noticed it. This got his hopes a little up.  
His hands slid up to her throat, the thought about choking crossed his mind for a moment but it wouldn’t do anything to her, she didn’t necessarily need air.  
So his hands slipped behind her neck and he opened her perfectly styled ponytail and repositioned her wet hair around her head, pulling it over her collar and breasts.  
He held her head in his hands and pulled her into an aggressive kiss, made her mouth his own and animated her to kiss him back. Her hands caught his bun and opened it as well, pulled on the brown strands and scratched his scalp lightly with her nails like he loved it.  
Both moaned as they violently made out with each other, while more water splashed around and over the rim, wetting the white carpet next to the pool.

His hands dug deeper underwater, grabbing her by her butt, lifting her up and on his hips. Her legs closed around him, locking her in place while their lips met and parted over and over again. He had kissed her countless times before. He had slept with her. She was his in every way, so why did he wanted her to deviate? An obedient woman who did everything for him?

Because this is not real…  
She was not alive.  
For years Elijah Kamski had asked himself and others if machines could feel. If they were able to be empathetic. And they were able to. Humanity had to learn that the hard way.  
Elijah was so proud of his creations. But why was Chloe different?  
She had the same biocomponents, thirium… He had tried to test her with his ‘Kamski test’ but it had failed. Chloe was responsible for the two other RT600’s that were stored in his basement, each of them looking like Chloe but with the addition of a bullet hole between their eyes.

He pushed her harder against the rim and she moaned as he kissed along her neck and mouthed at the spot where her shoulder and neck met. Her nails scratched his back, leaving red streaks behind. She knew he liked that. He had told her once and now it was saved in her memory forever. But it was a lie. She was a lie.  
She was a shell, that did whatever he told her to.  
It was not her wish to do this to him. It was always him who initiated intimacy. Intimacy and love that wasn’t real. She only did what he wanted.  
The urge, to know what her own thoughts and wishes were, burned deeply inside him.  
He loved her but didn’t love her. How was that possible?

“Elijah?” she pulled him out of his thoughts. He had totally forgot to kiss and touch her further. He let her down so she could stand on her own feet again. Her eyes searched for his, big and innocent as always. He loved them. He hated them. He hated himself...  
“What do you feel for me?” he asked sternly.  
Her LED blinked yellow, processing the question and searching for an answer.  
“Love.”  
“Really?” he pressured.  
“I- I think so. I- you never questioned my answer before.” A red LED followed, then back to yellow. “Did I gave a wrong answer?”  
“That’s for you to decide.” he told her and climbed out of the pool, dressing in a black bath robe.  
He went out of the room to get a drink.  
It was amazing how much he had achieved in his life. He had been CEO of CyberLife, he was a billionaire. He was the creator of a whole new species. And yet he was disappointed because of one single android. To be fair she was his first android. Chloe was special. Special in any way but particularly for him. She had a high personal value to him.

All day Elijah was in his thoughts, thinking about his past and Chloe. About the deviants, the protests of Markus, Connor’s mission and how he had failed, becoming what he had ought to end. Sometimes Chloe showed up, brought him food or asked if he wanted something.  
Every time he had dismissed her quietly.

At the end of the day he laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling where his face glared back at him, reflected by mirror shards in different sizes.  
Chloe knocked and entered. Like every day she undressed herself completely, draped her blue dress over the chair in the corner of the room and came towards the bed, waiting for him to scoot over.  
“Good night, Elijah.” she said, lightly kissed him on his cheek and wanted to turn around.  
She never slept. Androids didn’t need sleep to function but Elijah had programmed her to lay next to him until he’d get up. Sometimes he’d have sex with her, sometimes he would make small talk until he fell asleep.

This night he started to pulled her closer, put her head on his chest and cuddled her tight.  
Her artificial skin was soft to touch and her hair tickled his chest. She felt so human.  
“Good night, Chloe.” he hummed while softly petting her back, which was more to calm himself than her.

* * *

Like every day this week, he awoke in the same position as he fell asleep in, with Chloe still in his arms. When she felt him moving, she raised her head and told him a good morning. She got up and opened the curtains, then dressed herself and got him clothes.  
When she went to make him breakfast, he called hair back.

“I have something to do.” he explained. “You don’t have to prepare anything.”  
She nodded, her LED in a yellow shade.  
“What are your plans for today then? Should I reschedule your day plan?” Chloe asked politely. “No. Come with me.”  
Her expression showed confusion for a moment. She followed him out of the bedroom through the living room and into the hallway.

Elijah’s heart felt heavier than ever when he thought about his next actions and words. But he had made his decision.  
He took his wallet from the small cupboard next to him and rummaged a few seconds. Then he pulled a simple black card out and offered it to her. Chloe gave him a questioning face.

“This is a transaction card. It gives you authorization to get money.”  
“Why should I get money?” she asked, a yellow LED showing her confusion. “I don’t need anything.”  
“You will.” his mouth formed a thin line, his brows furrowed.  
“But you have anything I could need, Elijah.”

It hurt to look into her confused, innocent eyes.  
He felt his heart sink while telling her, that she wouldn't be with him anymore.  
“I’ll let you free. I decided that I have to let you go. I’m living a lie and I can’t stand it anymore.”  
Her LED kept being a distressed yellow as she clutched the black card in her petite hands.  
“How can I wish for machines… for androids to feel empathy, if I can’t even express it myself? I thought I loved you. I made you exactly like I wanted. You are perfect...  
But this is a lie. You are not yourself, you are who I made you. And if I am unable to make you yourself, then you have to find out who you are. I did awful thing to you. You are the last RT600... I’m setting you free. There are so many free androids by now. You will find your way. I’m sure you do.”

With that said he gently pushed her towards the front door, opened it and expected her to go.  
She looked outside, down the granite way that connected to a street that would lead to the midtown of Detroit. It was a sunny spring day, birds were somewhere close and sung their songs. A slight breeze tugged on Chloes blue dress and ponytail.  
She turned around, looked up to Elijah.  
“I don’t know what to do?” she said, a distraught expression on her face.  
“I can’t tell you either, Chloe.”  
“But-”  
“No, go.” he said and gently pushed her. He didn’t notice how her LED turned red, as he shoved her over the threshold.  
She tried to hold onto his arm. “Elijah!”  
“I have to let you go.” he said more to himself but rushed forward, bringing their lips together for one last kiss, before giving her another push that send her onto the pavement.  
“Now GO.”

She cried out in shock and Elijah quickly fled inside, closing and locking the door.  
He wasn’t sure if it was his heart or Chloe pounding against the door but he knew he didn’t like either of it.  
He stumbled into the living room, took a bottle of golden whisky from the bar and drank right from the bottle. How should he ever stomach what he just had done?

The whole day he heard Chloe’s pleading to let her in, that she would do anything for him, whatever she did wrong, she would be better now.  
Elijah took it as his punishment. Something like his personal hell, to listen to it.

A day after she was still knocking from time to time. Now formally asking to let her in.  
Still he ignored her. He had to…

At day four her knocking had stopped. When Elijah looked outside she was still sitting in front of the door, her arms hugging her legs, head propped on her knees. Her wet eyes were locked onto the spyhole as if she knew Elijah was there. Watching her. Had she been crying the whole time? She looked scared. Lost.  
Her LED glowed in a bright red shade.

Seven days after the incident, Elijah woke up in his bed. Alone. Like he had the past week.  
He groaned and got up, put his bathrobe on and walked into the kitchen to have a coffee.  
The curtains in his living room stayed closed. He didn’t eat anything for breakfast.  
Instead he took his filled mug and went to the hallway. Ignored the mirrors he passed, because he knew how deep the shadows below his eyes were and that he needed to shave.

He came to the door. He just had to take a glance at her. That was his guilty pleasure as well as his torture. Elijah looked through the spy expecting the girl in front of his door.  
Everyday she’d looked sader and lost.

But when he looked through the spy this day, Chloe was gone.

Surprised he unlocked and opened the door.

He looked around.

The only thing he found was a tiny round LED component beneath his feet...

(Might be continued....)


End file.
